The Carolean's Prayer

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I'm a 25-year-old male who has high-functioning autism. I express my frustrations with various aspects of my life, including my parents' resistance to modern technology, my struggles with mental health and seeking help, my social isolation and desire for a romantic partner, particularly a Japanese woman. I often fixated on drowning and violence, and my clashes with authority figures due to my outbursts and inappropriate behavior. I frequently go on tangents, making disturbing claims about wanting to harm others, committing acts of terrorism, or engaging in misogynistic and racist behavior. I seemed to have a deep-seated anger towards the world and felt constantly mistreated or misunderstood due to my autism. My rants are laced with vulgar insults, threats, and a general disdain for societal norms. Despite my alarming rhetoric, I also express a longing for love, intimacy, and validation. I crave affection from a caring partner who can soothe my rage and provide comfort. However, my impulsive nature and lack of self-control often undermine my desires, leading me down a path of self-destruction and isolation.

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